This blog will stay online for a short while, then it will forward to roseandposey.com, my new crafty blog about the art of natural perfumery and my attempt at learning it. Anyone that knows me knows I’m a complete perfume junkie. I’ve wanted to learn perfumery for about 5 years now and am finally making it a priority.

I’m very excited about what’s in store! I’ve needed a creative jumpstart for a while, and I’m looking forward to this beautifully scented journey.

Hope you’ll join me!

(P.S. You can still catch me over at ReboundPodcast.com, too!)

One of the greatest struggles that keeps Christians from experiencing abundant life is the temptation to try harder.  If you are struggling with something you are often told that you simply have to give it a little bit more effort.  Often times I will hear someone say, “I tried to do everything I could” but what they are really saying is “I haven’t been trusting what God has instructed.”

Too often “trying” involves us using our logic and rational thought at the expense of “trusting” what God has already said.

Since finances play a starring role in our lives right now, I know that I have been trying too hard to create more income instead of trusting God with the income I already have. I even mentioned this in our latest podcast, talking about the burnout I’ve experienced by working incredibly hard with no end goal in mind and therefore neglecting the money I already have because I’m too busy trying to earn more money. Sounds crazy, doesn’t it?

God hasn’t failed us yet. So why am I trying so hard to do it all myself?

When the hubby and I were at an all-time low last year and put full trust in God with our finances, He blessed us with such incredible abundance that we were left in complete awe. And without even realizing it, I took that control back and tried to create more income for us instead of continuing to trust God completely with our finances.

I’m a control-freak. I own it. I like setting goals, hitting them, moving on to the next one, accomplishing to the tenth degree and then some, but I’ve never stepped back to think at what expense?

I think that when you’ve been through the things we have been through, you are always afraid that one day you might end up right back where you were – broke, unhappy, scared, lonely and afraid. I don’t want to ever experience that again. Yet trying to do more is not the answer.

I’ve spent a lot of time in prayer about how I can balance my desire to get out of debt quickly with my need for stillness and slowness. God is definitely shedding some light on it all, and I’m starting to gain some clarity on how I can balance the two more easily than I am able to today.

But it all starts with trusting that God will do what He has promised to do. And that means letting go of being in control and allowing Him to take control.

Pastor Jeff continues:

Romans 9:31-32 says, “But the people of Israel, who tried so hard to get right with God by keeping the law, never succeeded.32 Why not? Because they were trying to get right with God by keeping the laws instead of by trusting in him.”

In what areas of your life are you trying instead of trusting?

I started the week out with the worst cold ever. On Monday, I felt like a truck had steamrolled me. Tuesday wasn’t much better. In fact, today is the first day that I’m actually feeling almost normal. So, starting a fast on this week made it even more difficult to stay focused and committed.

By Day 4 of the fast, I was hungry, grumpy and felt, for lack of a better work, completely unsatisfied. I had lost over 4 pounds and I was thinking about meals a lot. Not good for the liver and not good for me emotionally. So, on Day 5, I added in wheat and whole-grain bread, some dairy and chicken or fish at one meal a day. I’m still caffeine-free and sugar-free, and I feel incredible.

In fact, I woke up this morning and realized that I don’t crave sugar. This is a victory in itself.

At first, I felt that by adding in a few different foods not allowed during the fast, I was not actually fasting. But I think that the levels of sacrifice are different for each individual and just giving up caffeine and sugar are daunting for me. Also, I want to make sure that I do this in a healthy way for my body and the fact is, losing too much weight too quickly is just as bad on the liver as staying at an unhealthy weight. God knows where my heart is, and that’s what matters.

I went to the library yesterday and stumbled across On a Dollar a Day, a book by Kerri and Christopher of the One Dollar Diet Project. It caught my eye as I had the realization a few days ago that because the hubby and I are on Dave Ramsey’s plan, our grocery budget is small. When Spence and I started the Daniel Fast, we had to increase the budget and even then, I felt like we weren’t eating enough. I felt hungry all the time. Then it hit me – we were used to eating cheap, energy-dense foods and by doling out the same portions in veggies and fruits, we just weren’t eating enough. For our family to eat a vegan diet long-term would require us to double our grocery budget, something we can’t afford to do. This book explores the financial issues that many Americans face in regards to food, and why parents sometimes have to choose to feed their children 99 cent tacos instead of 99 cent oranges. So far, it’s a pretty good read.

Now that we’ve made some wiggle room in our budget, fasting has made us think more about our diet in general and ways that we can add in healthier foods in affordable ways. A while back, we decided to add in more whole foods to our diet, but we can do more. It probably means that we will increase our grocery budget, and we will do that by decreasing our television package, for instance, or our entertainment funds.

Overall, I’m relieved that on Day 6, I’m starting to feel better. The headaches are almost gone and I wake up feeling alive and ready to face the day instead of like a zombie until I get my caffeine. I’m also learning what it’s like to rely on God, and I’m excited to see what He has in store for our family.

(As a side note, the kids are not fasting with us. They are still happily eating regular meals.)

I’ve spent that last two months praying about the Daniel Fast and asking God for guidance on whether or not it’s something I should do. I’ve felt that God has been calling me to do this on a spiritual level so that I will learn to rely more on Him and less on myself and my vices (which never work anyway) and I know that taking better care of myself physically is something I have to do if I want to live a long life so the fast is a good first step. But honestly, I’ve been fearful that I will do the fast for the wrong reasons, like vanity, or that my body will perceive it as another diet and rebel. After spending much time in prayer over this, I know that it’s what I should do, so the hubby and I decided last week to do it together.

Today is Day One, and it’s a doozie.

Yesterday morning, I started getting the sniffles which didn’t seem like such a big deal, but by the end of the day, my head felt like it was going to explode. Today it’s even worse. I can’t breathe out of my nose, my body aches, my head is splitting, and I have none of my guilty pleasures to rely on to make me feel better.

All I want is a coffee, or a piece of chocolate, or both.

One thing is for sure: I’m learning quickly what it’s like to rely on God instead of vices.

If you’ve done the Daniel Fast, I’d love to hear about your favorite tips or recipes. Please share them in the comments.

When our family started budgeting, we were freed, in part, from this hum-drum existence. When you’re working Dave Ramsey’s plan, you have to put in the hours of work it takes to get out of debt, but once you start making progress, the things you dream of someday doing become a closer reality.

I’ve always wondered which came first: your passions or the money? Some people seem to have it made, doing something they are passionate about from Day One and making a modest income doing so. But for some of us, this isn’t the case. In a consumerist society, I would argue that things come first, and we all put our blinders on so we can focus on generating income to pay for those things. If we’re lucky, we will end up doing something we enjoy. But mostly, our true passions soon become one-day or when-I-retire dreams.

Last year, I decided that I wouldn’t hold off on passions on hold any longer. I’m getting out of debt as fast as I possibly can so that I can start doing the things I love doing. I love crafting, farming and the simple life, and I want to own a small-scale farm someday soon. That’s my one when-I-retire dream that I will make happen in the next couple of years.

Everything I do today is a step towards living a spirited life. And you know what? I’m having a lot of fun doing it.

What about you? Are you doing today what you are most passionate about? If not, what’s holding you back?

Image Credit: Joaaso

While my 6-year-old and I were listening to Modest Mouse’s Float On today, he looked at me and said, “You know why sometimes this song makes me cry a little bit?” His face was vulnerable, pained and sincere.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because it’s so pretty,” he said. “The sounds are so pretty that sometimes it makes me cry a little bit.”

When you find beauty in something, don’t be afraid to allow yourself to feel it with all of your heart. Sometimes it’s the smallest things that take our breath away. In a life full of moments, capture the ones that push you to the edge, the ones that make you cry just a little bit. Those are the ones worth savoring.

I said, “You know, sometimes songs that are really pretty make me cry a little bit, too.”

He smiled and started humming along with the tune.

One of the things that stood out to me during my marathon training was how easy it became for me to say “no” to so many things.  For those of you who don’t know me, I have always had a tough time saying “no.”  However, during my marathon training I found that if an activity had the potential of sidelining my training it was an automatic “no!”

For instance, I didn’t skateboard at all during my training.  I watched my family play flag football on Thanksgiving.

I know those sound lame but the reality is that I wasn’t going to waste months of my life training only to sprain my ankle on a skateboard.

It is easy to say “no” to things that you don’t want to do.  Most of us don’t struggle with that!  However, many of us struggle with saying “no” to the good so we can say “YES” to the great!

In less than 7 hours we are going to be entering into a brand new year.  What good things are you going to say “NO” to in 2010 so that you can say “YES” to the great things that come your way?

Today, I’m saying NO to the little wants and “needs” that derail my progress towards a healthier and happier me. I’m saying NO today to coffee and sugary foods so I can say YES this year to better health. I’m hoping that by saying no today, it will get easier to say no tomorrow.

What about you? What are you saying NO to?

Where ever you are this New Years Eve, I hope that you are staying safe and healthy.

As I reflect on this year, I am surprised at how much I already miss 2009. I’ve never been unhappy to see a year go. As I’ve moved into another year in the past, I’ve always had a level of optimism that things would somehow be different in the new year, that I would magically change, that everything would somehow be okay.

But this year, I took a long hard look at my life and realized that I don’t need a new year to give me hope for something more. All it takes is the willingness to plan for your life and, because you can’t accomplish it all yourself, faith that God will provide what you need when you need it.

I’ve spent a lot of time lately setting personal and financial goals, and next week I’ll be sharing a few with you.

Until then, happy new year!

Image Credit: Paul McDee

1. Ignore everybody.
2. The idea doesn’t have to be big. It just has to be yours. The sovereignty you have over your work will inspire far more people than the actual content ever will. Your idea doesn’t have to be big. It just has to be yours alone. The more the idea is yours alone, the more freedom you have to do something really amazing.
3. Put the hours in. If somebody in your industry is more successful than you, it’s probably because he works harder at it than you do.
4. Good ideas have lonely childhoods.
5. If your business plan depends on suddenly being “discovered” by some big shot, your plan will probably fail.
6. You are responsible for your own experience.
7. Everyone is born creative; everyone is given a box of crayons in kindergarten.
8. Keep your day job. The creative person basically has two kinds of jobs: One is the sexy, creative kind. Second is the kind that pays the bills. Sometimes the task at hand covers both bases, but not often. It’s balancing the need to make a good living while still maintaining one’s creative sovereignty. The young writer who has to wait tables to pay the bills, in spite of her writing appearing in all the cool and hip magazines… who dreams of one day not having her life divided so harshly. Well, over time the “harshly” bit might go away, but not the “divided.” This tense duality will always play center stage. It will never be transcended. And nobody is immune. Not the struggling waiter, nor the movie star. As soon as you accept this, I mean really accept this, for some reason your career starts moving ahead faster.
9. Companies that squelch creativity can no longer compete with companies that champion creativity.
10. Everybody has their own private Mount Everest they were put on this earth to climb. You may never reach the summit; for that you will be forgiven. But if you don’t make at least one serious attempt to get above the snow line, years later you will find yourself lying on your deathbed, and all you will feel is emptiness.
11. The more talented somebody is, the less they need the props. Meeting a person who wrote a masterpiece on the back of a deli menu would not surprise me. Meeting a person who wrote a masterpiece with a silver Cartier fountain pen on an antique writing table in an airy SoHo loft would seriously surprise me. A fancy tool just gives the second-rater one more pillar to hide behind. Which is why there are so many second-rate art directors with state-of-the-art Macintosh computers. Successful people, artists and nonartists alike, are very good at spotting pillars. They’re very good at doing without them. Even more important, once they’ve spotted a pillar, they’re very good at quickly getting rid of it. Good pillar management is one of the most valuable talents you can have on the planet. Keep asking the question, “Is this a pillar?” about every aspect of our business, our craft, our reason for being alive, and go from there. The more we ask, the better we get at spotting pillars, the more quickly the pillars vanish.
12. Don’t try to stand out from the crowd; avoid crowds altogether.
13. If you accept the pain, it cannot hurt you. You’re better off doing something on the assumption that you will not be rewarded for it, that it will not receive the recognition it deserves, that it will not be worth the time and effort invested in it. The obvious advantage to this angle is, of course, if anything good comes of it, then it’s an added bonus. The second, more subtle and profound advantage is that by scuppering all hope of worldly and social betterment from the creative act, you are finally left with only one question to answer: Do you make this damn thing exist or not?
14. Never compare your inside with somebody else’s outside. The more you practice your craft, the less you confuse worldly rewards with spiritual rewards, and vice versa. Never sell something you love. Otherwise, you may as well be selling your children.
15. Dying young is overrated. Every kid underestimates his competition, and overestimates his chances. Every kid is a sucker for the idea that there’s a way to make it without having to do the actual hard work. The bars of West Hollywood, London, and New York are awash with people throwing their lives away in the desperate hope of finding a shortcut, any shortcut. Meanwhile the competition is at home, working their asses off.
16. The most important thing a creative person can learn professionally is where to draw the red line that separates what you are willing to do from what you are not. It is this red line that demarcates your sovereignty; that defines your own private creative domain. What crap you are willing to take, and what crap you’re not. What you are willing to relinquish control over, and what you aren’t. What price you are willing to pay, and what price you aren’t. Art suffers the moment other people start paying for it. The more you need the money, the more people will tell you what to do. The less control you will have. The more bullshit you will have to swallow. The less joy it will bring. Know this and plan accordingly. When I see somebody “suffering for their art,” it’s usually a case of their not knowing where that red line is.
17. The world is changing. If you want to be able to afford groceries in five years, I’d recommend listening closely to the (people who push change) and avoiding the (people who resist change). In order to navigate the New Realities you have to be creative – not just within your particular profession, but in everything. Your way of looking at the world will need to become ever more fertile and original. The old ways are dead. And you need people around you who concur. That means hanging out more with the creative people, the freaks, the real visionaries. They’re easy enough to find if you make the effort, if you’ve got something worthwhile to offer in return. Avoid the folk who play it safe. They can’t help you anymore. Their stability model no longer offers that much stability. They are extinct; they are extinction.
18. Merit can be bought. Passion can’t. The only people who can change the world are people who want to. And not everybody does. Part of understanding the creative urge is understanding that it’s primal. We think we’re “Providing a superior integrated logistic system” or “Helping America to really taste Freshness.” In fact we’re just pissed off and want to get the hell out of the cave and kill the woolly mammoth.
19. Avoid the Watercooler Gang.
20. Sing in your own voice. The really good artists, the really successful entrepreneurs, figure out how to circumvent their limitations, figure out how to turn their strengths into weaknesses. Had Bob Dylan been more of a technical virtuoso, he might not have felt the need to give his song lyrics such power and resonance.
21. The choice of media is irrelevant. My cartooning MO was and still is to just have a normal life, be a regular schmoe, with a terrific hobby on the side. It’s not exactly rocket science. This attitude seemed fairly alien to the Art Majors I met. Their chosen art form seemed more like a religion to them. It was serious. It was important. It was a big part of their identity, and it almost seemed to them that humanity’s very existence totally depended on their being able to pursue their dream as a handsomely rewarded profession.
22. Selling out is harder than it looks. Diluting your product to make it more “commercial” will just make people like it less.
23. Nobody cares. Do it for yourself.
24. Worrying about “Commercial vs. Artistic” is a complete waste of time. It’s not about whether Tom Clancy sells truckloads of books or a Nobel Prize winner sells diddly-squat. Those are just ciphers, external distractions. To me, it’s about what you are going to do with the short time you have left on this earth. Different criteria altogether. Frankly, how a person nurtures and develops his or her own “creative sovereignty,” with or without the help of the world at large, is in my opinion a much more interesting subject.
25. Don’t worry about finding inspiration. It comes eventually. Find a way of working that makes it dead easy to take full advantage of your inspired moments. They never hit at a convenient time, nor do they last long. Writer’s block is just a symptom of feeling like you have nothing to say, combined with the rather weird idea that you should feel the need to say something. Why? If you have something to say, then say it. If not, enjoy the silence while it lasts. The noise will return soon enough.
26. You have to find your own shtick. Jackson Pollock discovering splatter paint. Or Robert Ryman discovering all-white canvases. Andy Warhol discovering silk-screen. Hunter S. Thompson discovering gonzo journalism. Duchamp discovering the found object. Jasper Johns discovering the American flag. Hemingway discovering brevity. James Joyce discovering stream-of-consciousness prose. Somehow while playing around with something new, suddenly they found they were able to put their entire selves into it.
27. Write from the heart.
28. The best way to get approval is not to need it.
29. Power is never given. Power is taken. The minute you become ready is the minute you stop dreaming. Suddenly it’s no longer about “becoming.” Suddenly it’s about “doing.” You didn’t go in there, asking the editor to give you power. You went in there and politely informed the editor that you already have the power. That’s what being “ready” means. That’s what “taking power” means. Not needing anything from another person in order to be the best in the world.
30. Whatever choice you make, the Devil gets his due eventually.
31. The hardest part of being creative is getting used to it.
32. Remain frugal. Part of being creative is learning how to protect your freedom. That includes freedom from avarice.
33. Allow your work to age with you. You become older faster than you think. Be ready for it when it happens.
34. Being Poor Sucks. The biggest mistake young people make is underestimating how competitive the world is out there.
35. Beware of turning hobbies into jobs. James Gold-Smith once quipped, “When a man marries his mistress, he immediately creates a vacancy.” What’s true in philanderers is also true in life. “Before, this man had a job and a hobby. Now suddenly, he’s just got the job, but no hobby anymore. But a man needs both, you see. And now what does this man, who’s always had a hobby, do with his time?” My friend held up his glass. “Answer: Drink.”

How many of these ideas are you already implementing in your life? What new ones inspire you?

(via Gwen Bell)

Julie Berlin
(This will be what my backyard looks like one day.)

Travis Hightower

Stuck in Customs

Paul Goyette

Heather

Click on each photo, then right-click and save-as-background to place these on your desktop. And don’t forget to visit the photographer’s flickr page. There’s many more gorgeous photos where these came from!

One of my favorite parts of the site is the Lessons Learned section. I think that we, as adults, tend to forget what little minds can absorb and are capable of during a arts and crafts session. With all of our multi-tasking, crazy, scheduled lives, we forget that children can’t handle the overwhelm, even in the form of a craft project. This is especially true for kids with ADHD, so using these tips will be very handy for me.

There’s a lovely Tutorials section to give you a few ideas for crafty things the kids can do, and the blog is a fun read, too.

If you want more ideas for crafting with the kids, check out Rosie O’Donnell’s Crafty U. We picked this up from the library and it is now on our purchase list. The projects are made just-for-kids, but the hubby and I found them to be quite a lot of fun as well.

What are your favorite sites and books for crafting with the kids?

I woke up early in the morning so that the family and I could make it to church for a special event. As I got ready, I found myself getting angry because I don’t have any casual clothing currently that I really like. In fact, clothing has become one of those things that we are now buying exclusively second hand and the boys come first, so that leaves a small clothing budget for me and the hubby.  Long story short, I was just really feeling sorry for myself that morning.

Now girls, I know you can understand my plight. As wives and mothers, we will happily go without so our family does not have to, but sometimes we just want to feel beautiful and splurge. And well, if you’re doing a Total Money Makeover, chances are you’re doing very little of that nowadays. This morning, I just wanted to feel beautiful. In reality, I felt miles from it.

I was still feeling a twinge of self-pity through the church service. It just wouldn’t go away. Top this with the daily worries about bills and income and savings that accompany getting out of debt and I was just feeling… blah.

On the way home, the hubby made a quick stop for gas so while the boys and I waited, I picked up his Bible and started randomly reading. In less than a minute, I happened upon these verses from Matthew 6:

“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear? These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.”

Matthew 6:25-34

This passage gave me unexplainable peace. If you’re in a similar situation, perhaps this scripture will help you as well.

Image Credit: Schwa242

Recently, I listened to two CraftSanity episodes regarding urban homesteading, one with the Beerhorst family (which was phenomenal) and one with Jenna Woginrich regarding her new book Made From Scratch: Discovering the Pleasures of a Handmade Life.  My ultimate dream is to have an urban homestead close enough to the city to enjoy it but far enough away to see the stars at night, so these interviews were quite inspirational.

After listening to the interview with Jenna, I knew that I would have to pick up Made From Scratch stat. Luckily, my library had a brand new copy. (Yay for free books!)

I started thumbing through it and quite a few chapters peaked my interest. “Angora Rabbits: Portable Livestock” is a chapter that will probably make me very wishful and make the hubby wish I never read it. I hear that as a knitter, the next step is spinning. And well, after spinning, it’s rabbits and sheep. And then it’s just downhill from there. On second thought, I might skip straight to this chapter.

There are also chapters on chickens (the most exciting backyard accessory since lawn darts), beekeeping, and the DIY wardrobe. Yesssss.

I’m fascinated by what Jenna has done with her small urban farm and hope that I can apply some of these self-sufficient tactics to my current everyday life. I can’t take on chickens just yet, but I can live more mindfully, healthfully, and happily. The chickens will come soon enough.

If you pick up a copy of Jenna’s book, leave a comment and let me know what you think.

Shop Indie Bookstores

Fusion Shrug from Pink Polish Design

Vine Yoke Cardigan from Twist Collective

February Lady Sweater from Flint Knits

Rona Lace Shawl from Knit Picks

Curvy by Jacquelyn Landry

I have a terrible dilemma. I want to knit them all!

When I found this set on The Pioneer Woman, my heart skipped a beat. I have been searching for dinnerware with these colors and a bird design for ages with no luck. This is exactly what I imagined they would look like.

The design is adorable, and I can imagine a kitchen decorated entirely around these plates. Seriously.

So, I visited the Lenox website and discovered that these beauties cost $100 per setting, and that’s the sale price. I’d easily need at least 8 place settings plus bowls, mugs, salad plates, and dessert plates. When you do the math, it’s not pretty.

Surely Target will be making a knock-off soon, right?

I am absolutely loving the new drop spindle. For less than $10, it surprises me how well it spins. As a knitter, I am fascinated by how yarn is made, and as an old soul, I’m fascinated by how it was made before advances in technology. This little spindle is quite a charmer and makes the prettiest yarn. Case in point:

This is my 2nd attempt and I’m getting better at drafting and judging how tightly to spin the yarn. I’ll be making my 3rd attempt this week.

Second, making stuff happen.

I posted my goals last week and so far, I’ve been doing very well. I’ve been making healthier choices, and I’ll be really focusing in on that even more this week. I haven’t done so well with working out, so I have to find the motivation to get that going. I think that once a few pounds come off, I’ll start feeling better. I’m still working on using healthy stress relief techniques. It’s too easy to fall into the old habits because it’s naturally the first thing I want to do, but I’m getting better at it.

I’m also learning to let go and let God do what he needs to do in my life. This is probably the hardest thing for me as I’ve really been struggling with it lately, but I’m also getting better with it. I have discovered that if I let go and let God work in my life, things seem to work out the way they should, but sometimes I just have a hard time letting things go. I’ve never had faith in anything before, so it’s difficult to rely solely on faith when I’m so used to relying on myself. Still, I have to remind myself about where that got me (nowhere, in case you’re wondering) and just hand it over. Something that seems so easy is, for me, the hardest thing to do.

Two examples: One, I know we should tithe, but we don’t yet. We are just making ends meet. I am having a hard time having faith that God will bless the 90% we have left because we need the full 100% to live comfortably. When we take out the 10%, it hurts. I can’t let go and just have faith. Two, next week Pastor Jeff is doing a baptism at the beach next week and Spence and I feel like this is the next step for us, but I haven’t signed up yet. I have no idea why I’m waffling with the decision to do this because I really feel it’s what I should do, but I am. In both cases, there is something holding me back. Is this a dilemma that all new Christians go through? Is it always this hard to have faith?

On a side note, I hear that John Edwards was at church today. We didn’t see him, but there was a little buzz online after we got home. I’m surprised there were no twitpics!

It’s no secret that I struggle with my weight, and I have come to terms with the fact that I will never be a size 4. For three years, I have carried around an extra 30 pounds that have pushed me from unsatisfied to uncomfortable and I’m tired of being uncomfortable in my skin. Therefore:

• I will lose 30 pounds by the end of the year.
  I will do this by making healthier choices, controlling my portions, and using my lunch break to fit in a workout 4x per week.

I have also used food to relieve my stress and this has become a problem. Therefore:

• I will use healthy stress relief techniques when I feel overwhelmed.
  This may be meditation/prayer or crafting for immediate relief, and yoga and plenty of sleep as a preventative.

Finally, my walk with God has just begun and I am having a hard time giving God full control of my life and letting go of the worry that is a constant for me on a daily basis. Therefore:

• I will become more conscious of the worry that invades my life and practice handing over life’s little annoyances over to God.
  I will also open myself up more to allow God to work within me. I have held back in some regards, which leaves me snarky and negative.

There. Now there’s no turning back.

We went to church this morning and it always amazes me how the messages we hear are exactly the things we need to hear in that moment. It feels so great to feel so close to God there, to feel him in me and the people around me. I never thought in a million years that Spence’s and my need for more positivity in our lives would be so life-changing. It is truly remarkable, and the feeling I have in church is the feeling I want to carry with me daily.

On that note, I’m off to edit Rebound.

Image Credit: pixelposition

God Is Ridiculous Closer from Lifepoint Church on Vimeo.

During the service and outside of the normal routine, prayer leaders were called to the front of the church to pray for anyone that needed prayer. Spence brazenly asked me if I wanted to go with him up there, and I was so thankful he asked because I never would have gone alone or asked him the same. The two people that were open to pray with us were the only two people that could understand us perfectly in that moment, although they probably had absolutely no clue that that was the case. I walked back to my seat feeling God move in me for the first time. It was amazing.

Lifepoint is participating in One Prayer, and Pastor Jeff talked about how God is ridiculous. Laughable at first, but really think about it.

“A ridiculous God makes ridiculous people do ridiculous things.”

When you’re called to do something absolutely ridiculous, do you follow God or do you laugh it off because it just sounds too crazy? Do you take that step of faith and trust that God will make it happen?

I’ve been praying a lot about what I am supposed to be doing in my life, and I feel called to be closer with my family and to be there for my boys by being in the home more than I am today. I also feel called to share my financial experiences with others because Spence and I have been down a long road of hurt financially and we are still together and stronger than ever.

Imagine… two people who know very little about finances, that have been greedy and unfulfilled in our past, that are just clawing their way out of the pit as I write, called to speak with others about finances and debt. Absolutely ridiculous.

We recorded our first episode of Rebound today.

It’s incredible how God works. I’m excited to see what else He has in store for us.

Lifepoint just wrapped up a series on Crazy Love and last Sunday, this passage was read from 1 Corinthians 13:

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 

When Spence and I were married, this is one of the few passages from the Bible that was read, but yesterday it took on a deeper meaning for me. We are all one with love. If I am patient and kind, I am able to set an example for my boys so that they will grow to be patient and kind men that will show their future partners the same type of love. And if I am able to be more patient and kind with my husband, he will in turn give back to me in the same way, creating a much stronger bond between the two of us.

I have been practicing being more patient, especially with the boys. I have my mother’s temper and it’s sometimes hard not to raise my voice when the boys are being loud or bickering about something. I am not perfect, but last week was much more enjoyable in part because I made an effort to be more patient. 

This Sunday after church, we met some friends at River Road park and had a cookout for lunch. We then walked to the pier where the kids did a little fishing. It was very windy so we didn’t catch anything, but it was a lovely afternoon. I realized that I can have all of the ambitions in the world, but my heart is with my family. I am learning that my goal in life may not be to be the best at something or to make the most money with something. My goal in life may be just to make enough money to be able to comfortably enjoy the little things with my family.